How I Met My Partner: ‘Friendzone’ no barrier to romance between Cork journalist and Waterford man

Journalist Rachel Lysaght met John Walsh in 2018 when they were both living on Magazine Road, and took some time to break out of the mutual friendzone.

Rachel explained: “Our friends were in a relationship at the time, so we met through them and started chatting regularly.” 

They went to a festival and spent the whole time together, with Rachel explaining:  “I’d resigned myself to the idea that we were just friends – I wasn’t aware that he liked me.

“When we got home, he texted one day, saying ‘do you want to come into town with me and pretend to be my girlfriend?’ – I was so confused!

“I asked my friends if they wanted to come too, we were all walking down when they asked to read the text again, then decided it didn’t sound like they should be coming.”

Rachel texted John and asked if it was okay if her friends came, and after typing for a long time, he said it was fine, but her friends decided to go home.

Despite panicking that she wasn’t prepared for a date, Rachel went to meet John, who was “visibly relieved” her friends had decided not to come, and they spent the afternoon looking through charity shops.

“We got to the till and there was a card game called ‘would you rather’ – I slid them open and the one on top asked ‘do you believe in love at first sight?’ 

 “I remarked that it wasn’t a ‘would you rather’ question, and the woman at the till asked John ‘well, did you fall in love with her at first sight?’ 

“I was mortified but he laughed, said ‘I did,” and bought the cards – I still have them five years later.” 

They spent the rest of the day together, and most days for months, until he asked her to be his girlfriend in September 2019.

Rachel explained: “Our demeanor towards each other hasn’t changed, we’ve always had that lighthearted banter, it’s part of why I fell in love.” 

Covid happened and a football injury led to John moving back home to Waterford, starting several years of on-and-off long distance relationship.

“It was a bit of a shock, long distance during a pandemic, but it never felt like there was a divide between us,” Rachel said.

Once restrictions had lifted, John moved to Dublin where he lived with friends while doing a Masters, with Rachel eventually moving up to the capital and getting her own apartment.

“I’d had this idea that it would be great, we’d see each other all time but his Masters was so intense that I didn’t get to see him that much, and I was really lonely up there,” she said, explaining that she moved back down to Cork after a few months.

They travelled up and down for 18 months, with Rachel keeping every train ticket.

“I’m one of those people that holds onto insignificant things, I have boxes of memorabilia from the start of our relationship but they’ll be really nice to show our children.” 

She moved back up to Dublin and they got an apartment together, but after six months, they looked at the amount they had spent on rent and realised that they could have gotten a mortgage, so they decided at the start of 2024 to move back home and save for a house in Cork.

He now lives in Waterford while Rachel lives in Cork, and they see each other as often as they can, sometimes multiple weekends in a row but occasionally not for as long as six weeks.

“We’ve grown accustomed to it,” she said, adding though there can be arguments “we have a very communicative relationship, we’re open about how we feel which sustains the long distance.

“We both know that we want what’s best for each other and want to be in each other’s presence.”