What’s his age again? Russell Wilson is overselling his age at Steelers camp

Fact. Russell Wilson is a man who will wear cologne to get the feeling right. While he was definitely still in elementary school with Enema of the State came out, we are starting to wonder what Russell Wilson’s age is again? He’s 35, going on 23, and nobody likes you when you’re 23… All the small things he does in the offseason he tells everybody about doesn’t change the fact that works sucks. I know…

While I for one sincerely doubt that his new Pittsburgh Steelers offensive coordinator Arthur Smith will leave him roses by the stairs, all the surprises that come from this Mike Tomlin-led operation will let him know that he cares. All I know is that it is way too unhealthy to never be starved for attention before. On his way to find the fountain of youth, Wilson found himself. Well, I guess this is growing up.

Feeling revived in every way, he can take the stage as the lead act for The Mark, Tom and Travis Show.

“Man, I feel the fountain of youth. I feel revived in every way, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I feel confident. I think at some point you have to know who you are as a player, as a man, as a competitor. As somebody who’s been fortunate to be able to play this game, I don’t doubt it. I trust it. I felt really good last year playing. I felt really confident in the midst of everything. And so I think right now I have all that confidence times 10.”

With how poorly things ended for Kenny Pickett in Pittsburgh, it has been man overboard in the Steelers’ quarterback room. It has been as awkward as a first date, with Wilson being anointed the Steelers’ starter, while Justin Fields is down, down, down, down on the depth chart. Some quarterbacks try too hard. I know that everything, know that everything, everything’s going to be fine.

Will his pass fall short this time, as smiles fade in the summer? “Place your hand in mine,” said Wilson.

What if I told you as a 30-something that I too have found the Fountain of Youth in my metropolis of residence? Yes, about a 10-minute walk from my place is a most glorious food hall and overpriced shopping establishment called Ponce City Market, as in Ponce de Leon Avenue, as in Juan Ponce de Leon. While he never made it to the ATL, Ciara is from here, and there used to be springs over there!

It was all happening over here at one point in time. The precursor to the Braves played over there. The precursor to Six Flags was over there. The precursor to the mall concept was over there. Sears was popping big time! While I would love nothing more than for Wilson to yell, “on your left!” riding a Bird or Lime scooter tandem with Ciara, I know he has work to do. He has to make the Steelers matter again.

With the blessing of the Fountain of Youth he found near presumably The Confluence, I wonder what kind of cool lie he would try to tell me if I saw him in Atlanta. I bet he would say that he could run from Piedmont Park to Krog Tunnel on the Eastside Trail in under 10 minutes. He did practice dodging, diving, dipping, ducking and dodging at a Richmond-area mall as a teenager, so I have to believe him.

Who knew that Wilson being the quarterback for the Steelers would be such a Ford Content Factory?